Checksum Arcanius

The 5mg oxycodone tablets I have are labelled “for breakthrough pain” which I have taken to mean pain that breaks through the background level of 10mg extended release oxycodone pills I have. I have stopped taking the 10mg tablets, and I have found that in my current state, I have to take about one 5mg tablet each night to make it through — or at least to be able to sleep.

On the flip side, I started physical therapy yesterday — I’m going again today, and then on Tuesday, after which I will be seeing Dr. Wahl for a post-surgical evaluation. One of the exercises I was supposed to do for physical therapy was to lift the injured leg, keeping it straight. Well, lifting the leg turned out to be quite an issue since, just as I was told would happen (though I didn’t believe it at the time), my right quad “forgot” how to operate. Or perhaps more precisely, I forgot how to operate my right quad. I could try with all I was worth, but I could not cause it to lift my leg. It was a frustrating, disenchanting, almost out-of-body feeling, not being able to control a leg that was clearly mine. Then I was trying again today, and suddenly, I regained control of the leg and it lifted. I don’t know why the sudden change, but it was not fleeting — the ability to lift the leg stayed with me. It was exhilarating to have the control back — I wanted to dance, but didn’t, because that probably would have been bad.

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